Life Advice: Don’t Find Your Passion


Study suggests meaningful work can be something you grow into, not something you discover.
Life Advice: Don't Find Your Passion

As a college professor, I have the privilege of advising young women and men as they make decisions about course selections, major areas of study, and life directions. Like other college students around the country, many of my advisees are searching for content they find interesting and meaningful, for work that is fulfilling and purposeful. Many are eager to “find their passion.”

On the surface, these goals seem laudable. Instead of seeking power, status or personal wealth, some students are motivated to discover their interests and uncover the path that excites and drives them. They want a career that lights their fire. Presumably they are adhering to the adage, “Do what you love and you’ll never work a day in your life.”

Recent research by investigators at Yale and Stanford, however, suggests this approach might be a mistake. Rather than seek the one job or career path that ignites our passion, we should invest meaningfully in different interests and work to cultivate a passion in one or more fields. By this view, interests are nurtured over time, not discovered overnight.

The key here is mindset. Some people adopt a “fixed mindset” approach and search for the one, predestined match in their lives. They expect this match to be enduring, full of excitement, and endlessly fulfilling. Fixed mindsets have been observed with romantic relationships and intelligence. Individuals with “destiny” mindsets about romantic relationships often seek “the one,” and tend to move on when faced with relationship challenges. Individuals with fixed mindsets of intelligence believe that intelligence derives from a fixed talent and cannot be cultivated or nurtured through experience. Across all these domains, fixed mindsets tend to eschew the notion that exploration and resilience can lead to positive change.

A fixed mindset about interests can be limiting in two ways. First, it implies that our interests and talents may be narrow or specific. Once we find a path that intrigues us and brings success, we may curb or even abandon exploration of other potential interests. Second, we may expect pursuit of our one true passion to be easy – after all, this is the pathway that will provide endless drive and excitement, and will yield the greatest achievement. Consequently, instead of demonstrating resilience and perseverance in pursuit of this passion, we may fold when faced with failure or significant challenge. Difficulty may be perceived as indication that we are simply on the wrong path.

By contrast, individuals with a “growth mindset” believe that interests or passions can be developed or cultivated through experience, investment, and struggle. There is not a single, “right” path to be discovered or revealed; instead, many different interests are viable, even simultaneously. With a growth mindset, success in one arena doesn’t preclude or limit exploration of other interests, nor does difficulty signal the need to change course.

Evidence from five experiments demonstrates that mindsets significantly influence what we expect to happen when pursuing our interests and how we respond to new possibilities and challenges. In one study, researchers first determined whether participants had a fixed or growth mindset about interests using a simple questionnaire. This survey gauged the extent to which individuals perceived interests to be permanent, steadfast, and static (fixed mindset), or malleable, flexible, and dynamic (growth mindset). Participants then gave answers to several open-ended questions concerning their expectations about outcomes when pursuing a passionate interest. Relative to participants who expressed a growth mindset about interests, those who expressed a fixed mindset were far more likely to expect endless motivation and minimal struggle when pursuing a confirmed passion.

Additional studies demonstrated that mindset influences more than expectations; mindset changes behavior. In one paradigm, participants read two different articles, one that matched their personal goals and pursuits, and one that did not. Participants rated their interest in each article. When the article content matched participants’ pursuits, having a fixed versus growth mindset did not matter; everyone found the matching article interesting. When the article content mismatched participants’ pursuits, those with a fixed mindset reported far less interest in the material than those with a growth mindset. In other words, a fixed mindset diminished curiosity about topics not directly relevant to one’s primary pursuit.

Mindset also affected outcomes in the face of difficulty. In a final study, participants first watched a popular science film clip about black holes, and rated their interest in the clip. Most found it fascinating. Those expressing high interest in black holes after viewing the film then read a complex technical report on black holes. They rated both how difficult and how interesting they found the report. Among those who found the technical report difficult to read, those with a fixed mindset subsequently expressed far less interest in black holes than those with a growth mindset. These findings suggest that when individuals with a fixed mindset pursue an emerging interest, they are more likely to lose interest in that topic if it becomes challenging.

On the bright side, a fixed mindset about interests may have its benefits. It may foster a single-mindedness that reduces distraction and promotes completion of a task. Assuming an individual faces minimal frustration when pursuing a passion, a fixed mindset may promote contentment and prevent endless consideration of alternative interests.

A fixed mindset about interests is likely to be a hazard, however, when advances within one’s field require the integration of broad and diverse knowledge sets, or when resilience is needed in facing new hurdles. For these reasons, college students would be wise to enroll in a variety of courses and to seek an array of experiential learning opportunities, including those that stretch them out of their comfort zones. Rather than searching for their one true passion, they should understand that interests, expertise, and even passion can be cultivated through experience, persistence, and hard work.

9 Ways to Actually Do What You Love.


Doing what you love is the cornerstone to having abundance in your life. ~Wayne Dyer

For most of us, life is so busy.

I’m usually up at 5:30 a.m. with my two year-old, and spend the next 16 hours chasing, wiping, cleaning, (coaching), snuggling, (writing), playing, dressing, (emailing), on-my-tummy-looking-under-the-couch shoe finding, and ending ‘I-had-it-first’ wars involving my 5 year-old.

In addition to being a mom of two, I’m also a life & career coach and a blogger. So I’m busy!

And whether or not your day involves diapers, I’m sure you have an equally busy (if not equally sticky) list of things to do. With so much on your must-do list, how do you find the time to even find, much less do, what you love?

Here’s a list of 9 ways that you can actually implement into your life whatever it is that you love.

1. Find what you love

It’s hard to follow your passion if you have no idea which way it went. If you already know your passion, you’re ahead of the game. But if you don’t this is the place to start. Generally, if you don’t know what you love there might be a few things happening:

a. You haven’t encountered your passion yet: In this case, get out there and start experiencing life. Try anything that sounds remotely interesting. Look to your personality, your past and your own hopes and dreams for clues.

b. You’ve “forgotten” your passion: Maybe it’s been so long since you did a particular thing that you’ve forgotten the love you have for it. Or maybe the love you used to have for something has faded. Work to rekindle the flame or remember the core of why you loved what you loved, and apply that to something new.

c. You’re afraid: Maybe your passion eludes you because you’re too afraid of what it would mean to know what you’re passionate about. Did you have a bad experience pursuing a passion in the past? Are you afraid that your passion will call on you to be bigger, stronger, brighter, and more out-there in the world than you feel comfortable with? It’s time to face your fear.

2. Make yourself a priority

You’ll need to actually carve out the time to do whatever you love. It doesn’t have to be a lot of time – any amount dedicated to what you love will make your life better.

But, to make yourself a priority, you’re going to have to practice the art of saying no. No to things that waste your time, to things you don’t want to do but feel you should, and to things you want, but that don’t actually make you happier.

3. Shift your mindset

It’s not groundbreaking to think that you can actually make time for your passion. What is groundbreaking though, is the shift that comes with actually knowing to your core that you can make time for your passionIt’s one thing to know it in your brain, and quite another to know it in your heart. Shift your heart so that you know that a passion-filled life is possible for you.

4. Consider other people

Sometimes the difficulty in doing what you love comes in the form of feeling you’ll be disappointing others by taking time away from them.

You can choose to involve other people in your passion, or you can make room for others to enjoy their own passion.Make it ok in your relationships to pursue things on your own, knowing you come back together as more whole people.

5. Lower the bar

In my work as a coach, I help people find their passions and put them to work – literally. But you don’t have to be paid to do what you love. Sometimes this requirement is just too much out of the gate. For now, begin doing what you love to do. If you love writing, write.

If you love cooking, cook. Don’t worry too much that it’s happening in your precious few “spare” hours. As it evolves, you may be able to find a way to make your passions pay the bills, but for now, just do what you love and don’t put so much pressure on yourself.

6. Do what you don’t love (with a happy heart)

Life is funny that way. But when you put your best energy into everything you do, you are rewarded. I can’t pretend to really know the mechanics of this, though I have some ideas. The point is, though, when you constantly push yourself to be the best you can be in any situation, you begin to invite abundance and opportunity into your life.

7. Be fearless

So often I see people get paralyzed by fear. Their brain fast forwards to a yet-to-happen event which causes them to stay stuck. “What happens if I’m not good enough? What happens if I can’t make it?”

It’s these fears – fears in anticipation of something that hasn’t even had the chance to occur yet, that prevents some people from even starting. Rest in the knowledge that you can handle whatever comes your way. Then keep moving.

8. Be positive

It’s easy to be beaten down by life sometimes, and the view from deep in that rut is less than hopeful. Consciously cultivate a positive attitude. It will carry you through the days when it’s easy to give up on passion – the days when you call your passion names like “pipe-dream.”

9. Do what you love

Don’t waste too much time planning to do what you love. Just do it. Pick up that paintbrush, your guitar, or your running shoes. Remember that often the barriers to doing what we love are of our own creation. You love what you love for a reason. Now get out there and enjoy it!

Are you ready to actually do what you love and live a happy and fulfilling life?

3 Ways to Follow Your Passion While Still Working a Full Time Job.


Choose a job you love, and you will never have to work a day in your life. ~Confucius

We have all been there – sitting in our cubicle staring into the distance, dreaming of the day when you could leave it all behind and really follow your passion.  Safe inside those four walls it sounds so nice, and just outside your grasp.  But how do you really develop the skills and income needed to leave your job, while still working at your full time job?  It’s hard to stay motivated and pursue your passion when you don’t have that much extra energy after work.

3-Ways-to-Follow-Your-Passion-While-Still-Working-a-Full-Time-Job-

Here are 3 ways you can keep nurturing your dreams and following your passion, so that when you’re ready to leave the full time job, the path is laid out before you.

1. Keep the Inspiration Alive

Whatever your dream is, make sure it stays alive and real.  Don’t let your ideas fester in your head, only to wilt away.  Feed it, give it a life of its own. Connect with your passion in real life – take classes, go to lectures, attend meetups with folks interested in similar activities.  If you’re passionate about becoming a life coach, attend a coaching seminar or workshop in your area.  If you long to become a yoga teacher, make sure you’re taking classes at a yoga school that also helps train new teachers.

Join online communities of likeminded folks, so you start building your network of people with similar ideas, dreams and passions as yourself.  Tell your old friends and new community about your dream.  It helps make it real and gives you invested stakeholders to support you on your way.

2. Connect with Other People Farther Along Your Path

You can learn from them what to expect, and what the potential pitfalls and benefits are.  It’s a fine line between connecting with people who are doing what you want to do and idolizing people who are years ahead of you.  It can be damaging to look at highly successful people and try to map your journey to theirs, because the distance is daunting.  Especially if you’re just starting out, this can cause paralysis and overwhelm.  We want to avoid that and keep you moving towards your dreams in an informed way.

Mentors are an amazing thing.  Build relationships with people that inspire you, and ask them to mentor you.  It’s a fast track for learning more about your chosen path, quickly.  Mentors can inspire you, support you, and help you understand the next steps in your journey.

3. Gain Experience

As much as possible, get your feet wet before leaving your job.  This way you will know if you really like it, or just loved the idea of it.   It’s totally fine to like an idea more than the reality of something – and it’s good to know if that’s the case before you cut ties (and loose a paycheck).  If you do love it as much as you think you do, it’ll only motivate you more to keep following your passion – and the time gaining experience will give you a solid boost when it’s time to spread you wings and fly on your own.

All of these things can be done after work or on the weekends.  Generally, the more we love something, the more reward we feel doing it, the more motivated we are to invest more time in it.  So don’t be surprised if these start out as one or two hour a week activities that end up taking most of your time! That’s a good thing, it means you’re on the right path, following your passion, making your dreams happen.

If you do follow your bliss you put yourself on a kind of track that has been there all the while, waiting for you, and the life that you ought to be living is the one you are living. Follow your bliss and don’t be afraid, and doors will open where you didn’t know they were going to be. ~Joseph Campbell

Source: http://www.purposefairy.com

The Secret to Finding Your Life’s Purpose.


The purpose of our lives is to be happy. ~Dalai Lama

You’re drifting, floating along through life with no sense of direction. Like Trent Reznor said, every day seems the same. You wake up, go to work, come home, go to sleep, and do it all over again tomorrow. And the whole time, you don’t feel like there is a point to any of it. It is so frustrating. Maybe you are not happy with the work. Or it could be the compensation isn’t enough for the lifestyle you want.

Whatever the reason, your life seems to lack purpose, and you desperately want to know how to find it.

You’ve read blogs, listened to podcasts, and watched videos. Maybe you bought tons of books or even attended expensive conferences to figure it out. But none of it has helped you.

So, how to we find our life’s purpose? How do we get to the point where we are doing work we find meaningful, and that puts our hearts and minds at ease?

It’s not as complicated as you think.

It is not that we have so little time but that we lose so much. … The life we receive is not short but we make it so; we are not ill provided but use what we have wastefully. ~Seneca

Is Passion, Purpose?

I hear a lot of people talking about finding their passion. Again, there are plenty of blogs, websites, books, and seminars out there trying to get people to pursue their passions. But is passion the same as purpose?

purpose

I love American football. I can’t get enough of it. However, football is a hobby. It isn’t my purpose in life to sit around watching football all day and then talk about it with friends. Sure, I could maybe come up with a way to create a business around football, but I highly doubt I would ever feel like that was what I was truly called to do.

When we are searching for our life’s purpose, we must be careful not to get caught up in excitement or enjoyment of something. That’s not to say you can’t enjoy your work.

I believe you definitely can.

The Secret to Finding Your Life’s Purpose

I was speaking to a friend who was trying to create an online business. He had decades of experience creating and running brick and mortar businesses, but was totally lost when it came to doing something online. He wasn’t sure what he wanted to do but he knew that it needed to be something in the leadership space. I asked him why that particular market.

What he told me will stick with me for the rest of my life, and is the ultimate secret to finding your life’s purpose. I wish I’d thought of it sooner.

He said to discover whatever makes your heartbeat fast and go for it. In other words, when you find yourself talking about a topic you’re interested in, and your speech picks up, your heart begins to beat rapidly, and you find a fire inside your mind as if you want to share your thoughts with the entire world, that is when you know you have found something that can be your life’s purpose.

For me, the idea of self-publishing books is one of those things. I speak to other authors or would-be authors all the time about the benefits of self-publishing. I find that when I start talking about it, my heart beats fast, my words come out in an avalanche, and time goes by very quickly.

Why? Because I feel like showing other writers how they can achieve something that is their dream, is a great work. It is work that fills me with purpose.

True happiness… is not attained through self-gratification, but through fidelity to a worthy purpose. ~Helen Keller

What’s The Difference?

I spoke about football, something I’m passionate about, and writing books/self-publishing. I get excited about both of those things. So, how do I know which one should be my purpose in life?

It’s simple. If you find work that you love, get excited about, and helps someone else in the process, that is when you know you’ve found something. And the helping part can be almost anything! Maybe you can help relieve stress, show people new things in life, or give them an edge in something that is important to them.

You could run a surf school in Costa Rica, be a golf instructor, operate an adventure tour business in Romania, or help poor people get investment funding to start their own businesses. The opportunities are literally limitless.

Your Turn. Think about the things you’re passionate about. Which one of them teaches, relieves, or helps someone else in some way? Write down a small list. Maybe put it in the comments below. Odds are, one of those is something you could pursue. And the fulfillment you get out of it will show you a life you always dreamed of.

Source: http://www.purposefairy.com

9 Ways to Actually Do What You Love.


Here’s a list of 9 ways that you can actually implement into your life whatever it is that you love.

1. Find what you love

It’s hard to follow your passion if you have no idea which way it went. If you already know your passion, you’re ahead of the game. But if you don’t this is the place to start. Generally, if you don’t know what you love there might be a few things happening:

a. You haven’t encountered your passion yet: In this case, get out there and start experiencing life. Try anything that sounds remotely interesting. Look to your personality, your past and your own hopes and dreams for clues.

b. You’ve “forgotten” your passion: Maybe it’s been so long since you did a particular thing that you’ve forgotten the love you have for it. Or maybe the love you used to have for something has faded. Work to rekindle the flame or remember the core of why you loved what you loved, and apply that to something new.

c. You’re afraid: Maybe your passion eludes you because you’re too afraid of what it would mean to know what you’re passionate about. Did you have a bad experience pursuing a passion in the past? Are you afraid that your passion will call on you to be bigger, stronger, brighter, and more out-there in the world than you feel comfortable with? It’s time to face your fear.

2. Make yourself a priority

You’ll need to actually carve out the time to do whatever you love. It doesn’t have to be a lot of time – any amount dedicated to what you love will make your life better. But, to make yourself a priority, you’re going to have to practice the art of saying no. No to things that waste your time, to things you don’t want to do but feel you should, and to things you want, but that don’t actually make you happier.

3. Shift your mindset

It’s not groundbreaking to think that you can actually make time for your passion. What is groundbreaking though, is the shift that comes with actually knowing to your core that you can make time for your passion. It’s one thing to know it in your brain, and quite another to know it in your heart. Shift your heart so that you know that a passion-filled life is possible for you.

4. Consider other people

Sometimes the difficulty in doing what you love comes in the form of feeling you’ll be disappointing others by taking time away from them. You can choose to involve other people in your passion, or you can make room for others to enjoy their own passion. Make it ok in your relationships to pursue things on your own, knowing you come back together as more whole people.

5. Lower the bar

In my work as a coach, I help people find their passions and put them to work – literally. But you don’t have to be paid to do what you love. Sometimes this requirement is just too much out of the gate. For now, begin doing what you love to do. If you love writing, write. If you love cooking, cook. Don’t worry too much that it’s happening in your precious few “spare” hours. As it evolves, you may be able to find a way to make your passions pay the bills, but for now, just do what you love and don’t put so much pressure on yourself.

6. Do what you don’t love (with a happy heart)

Life is funny that way. But when you put your best energy into everything you do, you are rewarded. I can’t pretend to really know the mechanics of this, though I have some ideas. The point is, though, when you constantly push yourself to be the best you can be in any situation, you begin to invite abundance and opportunity into your life.

7. Be fearless

So often I see people get paralyzed by fear. Their brain fast forwards to a yet-to-happen event which causes them to stay stuck. “What happens if I’m not good enough? What happens if I can’t make it?” It’s these fears – fears in anticipation of something that hasn’t even had the chance to occur yet, that prevents some people from even starting. Rest in the knowledge that you can handle whatever comes your way. Then keep moving.

8. Be positive

It’s easy to be beaten down by life sometimes, and the view from deep in that rut is less than hopeful. Consciously cultivate a positive attitude. It will carry you through the days when it’s easy to give up on passion – the days when you call your passion names like “pipe-dream.”

9. Do what you love

Don’t waste too much time planning to do what you love. Just do it. Pick up that paintbrush, your guitar, or your running shoes. Remember that often the barriers to doing what we love are of our own creation. You love what you love for a reason. Now get out there and enjoy It !!

 

Source: purposefairy.com

 

 

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