Have you ever wondered if all couples fight?
Statistics show that, on average, couples fight 1 to 3 times per week. Fighting in relationships may seem like a normal thing for many people. However, it is vital for a thriving relationship to figure out good problem solving techniques. In this article, I will explain why it is important not to fight and the seven steps you can apply to live a thriving “relationship without fighting”.
Times have changed; in contrast with the past, relationship dynamics have seen a shift. From being based on merely a transaction between two people to gain benefits and fit into society to the freedom to choose our companion, leading to physical and psychological fulfilment.
As modern-day couples, we must not let this freedom of choice overpower us. Working on one relationship and being wholly committed is essential. However, couples think that having a thriving and healthy relationship means sometimes fighting and yelling at each other when dealing with problems is inevitable.
Sadly, they don’t know the proper steps to problem solving and often give up on their relationships. Divorce statistics show that nearly three divorces occur in the time a couple recites vows.
We must first build good foundations to establish a good relationship dynamic. 3 in 5 couples are unhappy, which is why a good start will avoid tensions and unnecessary fights later down the line.
Follow the steps below to become a thriving Power Couple.
Studies have also shown that modern-day relationships cannot last long if both partners do not invest time in each other. We must interact with one another and talk openly if an issue arises; it is the main factor in improving relationships and turning them from difficult to thriving.
Nevertheless, it does not mean that couples should always agree with each other. It is a sign of a healthy relationship to have different opinions than your partner and be able to voice your concerns to them. Still, we must refrain from fighting over it.
As mentioned above, it is normal to have different opinions than your partner. The main aim is to learn how to resolve problems that arise due to these different opinions in a healthy manner. One thing to remember when you face a problem with your partner is that it is not Partner one vs Partner two. Instead, it is the Couple vs the problem.
In this 7 step problem solving technique, I will show you how to find solutions to your problems in a compassionate manner.
You must choose the right time to discuss the problem with each other. Don’t have this conversation in front of other people. Additionally, if emotions are high at a particular time, then go into separate rooms and calm down beforehand.
Decide which problem both of you are facing. Agree on one issue and work through that.
In this step, each person will give their opinion and interpretation of the problem. It is essential not to be judgmental of your partner’s views and to have an open mind while listening to them.
What is the outcome both of you want from this conversation?
Decide one potential solution to your problem. It can be more than one solution and multiple solutions at once.
Pick one solution with your partner that you will try and work on.
In this final step, you need to see if the issue has been resolved through your chosen solution. Sometimes it takes more than one attempt, and that’s ok! Pick another solution to the problem and try again.
Fights in relationships lead to conflict, anger, stress, resentment, disappointment, and frustration. They will result in disconnection from your partner and a lack of intimacy. A fight can leave long-term marks, even if it is just for an hour.
Comparing yourself to others is a recipe for disaster. As you realize that you are a unique individual, with unique gifts and talents, you will no longer feel the need to inflict pain upon yourself by comparing yourself to others. ~Luminita D. Saviuc
What keeps so many people from enjoying a happy, peaceful, and meaningful life, is this unhealthy need to compare themselves with other people.
Instead of focusing on themselves and the things they ought to be doing, they look to their left and to their right at what others are doing. Failing to realize that in doing so, not only will they cause themselves a lot of pain and suffering, but they will also slow themselves down in life.
Here are 7 ways to stop comparing yourself to others and start valuing yourself instead:
You are a unique individual with unique gifts and talents. You have your unique path to walk in life and your own purpose to fulfill.
What you can do, nobody else can.
And if that’s the case, you might as well start focusing on the things that can bring you joy and peace. And stop comparing yourself to others.
Every time you compare yourself with others you send a signal to your brain that who you are is not enough – good enough, smart enough, confident enough, successful enough, skinny enough, etc., and that everybody around you is better than you yourself are.
But that’s just a big fat lie!
You are worthy. You are whole. And you are enough! So please, let go of this unhealthy need to compare yourself to others. And start loving and valuing yourself for who you truly are.
I know this world tries very hard to trick us into thinking we are in competition with one another and that we have to do our best to run faster, do things much better, and achieve a lot more than our fellow human beings because if we don’t, we’ll fall behind and humanity will walk all over us.
But that’s just nonsense.
You are not here to compete with anyone! And you surely are not here to be better than anyone.
You are here to be better than yourself.
You are here to become better today than you were yesterday, and tomorrow, better than you are today. And as you start focusing on bettering yourself instead of constantly comparing yourself to others, you will discover that there is no need to compete with anyone.
Even though the majority of people have a scarcity mindset (at the way things are in the world, that’s no surprise), the truth of the matter is that we live in an abundant universe and that there is enough for everyone.
There’s nothing to fear.
What’s yours is yours. What’s theirs is theirs. And if you stay focused on your path, your vision, and the things you came here to do, you will create so much happiness, joy, and abundance, that you will not what to do with it.
I know it can be quite challenging at times not to compare yourself to others, especially when with this whole social media madness. But if you feel that there are certain things, people and situations that weaken you, causing you to fall into this pattern of comparison and competition, it is best to distance yourself for a while from those things and surround yourself with that which gives you power, strength, wisdom, and confidence.
You want the world to see, love, value and to appreciate you. But you have to understand that this is a sure way to inflict a lot of pain onto yourself. And you know why? Because the world might never see you for who you truly are. And if you don’t learn to love and value yourself, you might live your entire thinking you’re unworthy.
Which isn’t true at all.
Learn to value yourself – what you do, and who you are. And know that you aren’t here to impress, or get anyone’s approval. You are here to Be Yourself.
Each morning when you wake up, and right before you go to sleep, I want you to repeat yourself these words to yourself. But I want you to feel them, and to let their power to infuse every cell of your body with Light, Love, and Truth. Because they will!
Place your hands over your heart, take a deep cleansing breath, and repeat these words to yourself:
In this moment I am enough,
I know enough.
I have enough.
I am perfect just the way I am.
Because the truth of the matter is that you are enough! And the time has come for you to stop comparing yourself to others and start being the wonderful, creative, genius, and unlimited being you were created to be.!
What about you? Do you tend to compare yourself to others? If so, what is the one thing you can start doing today to stop comparing yourself to others? You can share your comment in the comment section below 
There are great men and women who walk this earth with so much grace, inspiring and empowering millions of people from all over the world to live their lives in ways that bring more love, joy and hope to the world. And Abraham Lincoln was one of those people.
Abraham Lincoln was one of a kind, and his famous letter to his son’s teacher is proof of that.
Enjoy
“My son starts school today. It is all going to be strange and new to him for a while and I wish you would treat him gently. It is an adventure that might take him across continents. All adventures that probably include wars, tragedy, and sorrow. To live this life will require faith, love, and courage.
So dear Teacher, will you please take him by his hand and teach him things he will have to know, teaching him – but gently, if you can.
Teach him that for every enemy, there is a friend. He will have to know that all men are not just, that all men are not true.
But teach him also that for every scoundrel there is a hero, that for every crooked politician, there is a dedicated leader.
Teach him if you can that 10 cents earned is of far more value than a dollar found.
In school, teacher, it is far more honorable to fail than to cheat.
Teach him to learn how to gracefully lose, and enjoy winning when he does win.
Teach him to be gentle with people, tough with tough people.
Steer him away from envy if you can and teach him the secret of quiet laughter.
Teach him if you can – how to laugh when he is sad, teach him there is no shame in tears.
Teach him there can be glory in failure and despair in success. Teach him to scoff at cynics.
Teach him if you can the wonders of books, but also give time to ponder the extreme mystery of birds in the sky, bees in the sun and flowers on a green hill. Teach him to have faith in his own ideas, even if every one tell him they are wrong.
Try to give my son the strength not to follow the crowd when everyone else is doing it.
Teach him to listen to every one, but teach him also to filter all that he hears on a screen of truth and take only the good that comes through.
Teach him to sell his talents and brains to the highest bidder but never to put a price tag on his heart and soul. Let him have the courage to be impatient, let him have the patient to be brave.
Teach him to have sublime faith in himself, because then he will always have sublime faith in mankind, in God.
This is the order, teacher but see what best you can do. He is such a nice little boy and he is my son.” ~ Abraham Lincoln’s Famous Letter to His Son’s Teacher
ARYAN'S BLOG 